Drabbles
by DreamerzLove
Summary: drabbles and such from D/D nights and my otherwise twisted mind... Read and enjoy :
1. Fleas

She was getting sick and tired of this. Kagome frowned as she picked yet another flea from her hair. One would think that Lord Sesshoumaru was the perfection that his name claimed… but now.. She knew better.

He was absolutely covered in fleas, which seemed to have a fetish with her own hair instead of the dogs fur. She was going to kill him when she saw him again. Giving her fleas, REALLY? Even Inuyasha didn't have them and he NEVER bathed.

One ride in his true form and now she was flea-ed for life. Dogs royally sucked….


	2. Hydrosis

'Oh today was just perfect' Thought Kagome sarcastically as she stood glaring at the great Lord Sesshoumaru. It had started out good, but as the day drug on it seemed to get hotter and hotter, which meant as a human she became covered in sweat.

But that didn't give the almighty lord himself reason to embarrass her because of it! Pushing her into a stream because she 'stunk' what nerve! Deciding to confuse him, she stood and said, "Don't get your knickers in a twist, it's called Hidrosis."

He gave her a blank stare and only asked one word. "Knickers?"


	3. Vibrating

Seshoumaru eyed the Miko's bag. It was moving…

Stepping closer to it he poked it delicately with a claw. 'What manner of creature lurked inside?' He asked himself as he glared at the vibrating bag.

"Miko, I demand you release that creature." He stated eyeing the bag.

Kagome came over and unzipping her bag, pulled out a vibrating red …. thing.. Seeing it Inuyasha made a hasty retreat and hid behind his half brother murmuring 'Evil' and 'Don't let it get me' the whole time.

Sesshoumaru watched confused.

"It's only an Elmo Toy." Stated Kagome, who had fallen over laughing.


	4. Tarantella

**Kagome stood before a hot spring. she entered after making sure no one else was around. Really how hard was it to be alone?**

**Getting into the water, she started dancing , practicing. In just a weeks time she was heading to her father's and she wanted to show him that she could do the Tarantella.**

**In the middle of her dance she turned around saw Sesshoumaru standing there with his poker face. Covering herself as she yelped, she sunk down into the water.**

"**Your dance?" He demanded.**

"**The Tarantella." She replied embarrassed.**

"**This one Believes you should be exorcised."**


	5. Meridian

Kagome eyed the males around her. She was currently working on her vocabulary home work for English, and needed to find a good definition for the word meridian. As it stood everyone around her was a good definition. Every guy was in his prime. Glancing at Sesshoumaru she asked him the question.

"Are you are at your meridian?" okay she already knew the answer but wondered what he would say about the word.

"Miko, I am not nor have I ever been a merman nor a mermaid." He simply stated.

While poor Kagome was picturing him as a mermaid, trying yet failing to hold in her laughter.


	6. Lackadaisical

Kagome laid sprawled out in the middle of a field, everyone else gathered around her as she just sat and giggled.

"Get up wench! We have more shards to get!" Screamed Inuyasha.

"No can do mister puppy man." Kagome giggled out. "I'm to lackadaisical."

"Lacka what?" asked the dumbfounded inu.

"lackadaisical" giggling once again "it means.."

"You do not lack music for This One is here to sing!" Cried out Sesshoumaru as he waltzed in the clearing wearing a tutu.

Kagome awoke with a start.

"Note to self no more pickles before bed."


	7. Cigs

**Kagome sat doing the one thing she wasn't able to do around Inuyasha. The 'innocent' miko sat smoking a cigarette. She chuckled as she blew the smoke out of her nose, the inner Kagome picturing herself as a dragon. She was completely at peace, but as things do, that's when things got hairy. LITERALLY!**

**In bounded Sesshoumaru in all of his canine glory. Kagome sat there wide eyed as she watched him begin to chase his tail. 'WTH?' went threw her mind as she eyed her pack of cigarettes.**

**Standing up she threw them away as she simply walked away.**

"**No more cigarettes… To many chemicals.… "**


	8. Disembowel

'Really? Was her life always this messed up? ' Kagome asked herself as she glared at the canine version of a snowman. He had just threatened to disembowel her, of course he didn't use such a nice word. The dog had gone into detail. Seriously?

She glared harder at him as she uttered her next words. "Why oh Great Dog Demon do you wish to disembowel me?"

Sesshoumaru growled. Eyeing the woman as though she were insane.

"I mentioned nothing about a bowl, Miko."

The poor Miko promptly smacked her self in the forhead. Stupid stupid Dogs. Why her?


	9. Tar

Kagome couldn't help it, seriously she couldn't. She was laughing so hard, she was sure she'd have huge grass stains. She made a mental note never to allow the 'brothers' to EVER do work on her house again. In front of her stood the great and powerful Inu Lord, but he certainly didn't look powerful right now.

It seems the brothers had a tar fight and the poor guy had been covered head to toe in the sticky sticky substance.

Looking up at her roof, her giggling fit ended. There stood Inuyasha covered in tar AND the roofing tiles.. Her roof was in even worse condition.


	10. DOOOOM

Inuyasha stood his sword held out in front of as the scent of his brother made itself known.

"Sesshoumaru." he growled before his brother could appeared.

Kagome giggled as she finished the last of her Snickers bar. Behind Inuyasha, Kagome watched Sesshoumaru stroll into the clearing. Unable to stop herself, she became singing the Doom Song.

"Doom."

Inuyasha slowly turned around and gapped at her, as everyone around her froze then did the same. Sesshoumaru eyed her as one would a mental patient.

"DOOOOOOOOOOOM!"

It was then that Kagome decided Sugar, cartoons, and the feudal era so DID NOT mix.


	11. Paralytic

Kagome sighed, was it just her or were the Fates deciding to really mess up her day? First Kouga had caught her in her bath, Inuyasha had then fount Kouga and her during her bath, Sesshoumaru decided to show up after they had gotten back and now Inuyasha was passed out with a sword threw his back.

"Seriously Sesshoumaru! Did you have to turn him into a Paralytic puppy just because he saw me during my bath?"

"Hn" stated the Inu as he eyed Kagome before walking away. "If you desire to keep him unharmed keep him out of the hot springs."

"Jerk!"


	12. Quack

Kagome would die if this wasn't a dream. She even tried pinching herself awake. In what world did she honestly deserve such punishment?

"Quack quack!"

Right now she was seriously hating her life err dream.

Before her in all of his glory stood Sesshoumaru… acting like a duck.

"Quack!"

"FOR THE LAST TIME… YOU ARE A DOG NOT A DUCK! YOU GO GRRRRRRRRRR INSTEAD OF QUACK!" Hollered a freaked out Miko.

"QUAAAAAAAACK!"

What did she do to deserve this? SERIOUSLY? Next time she'll try her best not to sit Inuyasha when he's in a tree above Sesshoumaru.

"I DON'T CARE IF INUYASHA HIT YOU ON YOUR HEAD.. YOU QUACK ONE MORE TIME I SWEAR!…."

"QUAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!"


	13. Thunder

The ground rumbled, shaking the miko off of her feet. Looking up from her spot on the ground, she noticed not a cloud in the sky. Perplexed she looked to the transformed Sesshoumaru.

"Was that thunder?" She asked him before something reached her nose.

Sesshoumaru let out a rumbling chuckle as he watched the looks passing on the Miko's face.

"EEEWWWWW!" She practically gagged. Covering her nose she eyed the demon with a look of utter revulsion.

"Next time… PLEASE… I BEG OF YOU!… Tell me when you have to pass gass so I can go hide or atleast cover my mouth and nose." requested the Miko as her eyes watered and she continued to gag.


	14. FOUR!

Kagome had a new game. 

She stood in a clearing a golf club in one had a golf ball sitting before her on its tea. Drawing the club back she effortlessly sent the small ball sailing across the air….

Just as Sesshoumaru walked in on the other side of the clearing.

"FOUR!" Hollered out Kagome right before the small ball hit him on the top of the head.

He glared at her before growling out… "That was only one… and if three more follow that one .. You will be a dead Miko.."

With a loud eep, Kagome swiftly fled.


	15. Late

"I'm late… I'M LATE!" Screamed Kagome as she hopped around grabbing up her bag and her other belongings, oblivious to the very confused faces of the gang around her.

"Kagome?…. What exactly are you late for?" Braved Miroku as he eyed her jumping around.

"I'm late for my first period!" She called as she ran to the well before jumping over.

Sesshoumaru just blinked.. Thinking…

"This one believed Humans had their first heat at a younger age…"

Inuyasha's face heated up as he stuttered, "She m.. meant sc..school, n.. not th .. that.."

Miroku just stood with his perverted grin before Sango once again knocked the poor misunderstood monk out.


	16. Aloha

Kagome grinned as she read a pamphlet for a vacation spot her family was going to go in about a week. The front said ALOHA! And then it opened up to show the hotel and the island of Hawaii. Glancing at her friends in the past, her eyes landed on Sesshoumaru as he was making his way back into the campsite.

"ALOHA MISTER FLUFFY PUFF!" With that said she took another drink of her sake and grinned at him.

Sesshoumaru lifted his eyebrow and eyed her. "Aloha?" He then narrowed his eyes. "Fluffy Puff?"

"No more Sake for Kagome!" Screamed Shippo as he hid from the grownups.


	17. Content

Kagome laid curled up inside her sleeping bag. Today had been a busy day and she was content just to lay there within the warmth of her bag.

To anyone that looked at her as she grinned snuggling more into it, they would have said she looked like a smug caterpillar, but for this poor miko her contentment did not last.

In walked Sesshoumaru, eyeing the strange thing the miko had covered herself in. He promptly appeared at her feet and effortlessly pulled the bag from around the miko, sniffing it.

"It was eating you." He stated as she growled.


	18. Evasive

"Evasive maneuver!" Screamed Kagome as she ran one way then the next.

They had just killed a giant squirrel demon, and before she knew it, there stood Sesshoumaru transformed. He eyed the squirrel before sniffing the air and then sniffing it.

With his tongue hanging out and a wag of his tail, he had flopped on his back and began rolling in the now dead squished creature. Kagome just happened to be standing beside the creature before the large Inu decided to 'play' in it. So there she was now screaming at the top of her lungs trying with all her might to stay out from under the guts covered lord.

Was no one on her side anymore?


	19. Razor

Okay they say that foxes are curious, which is true, but what they never say is the fact that dogs are just as bad. That was what was afflicting the inu lord at this exact moment.

He had walked in on the Miko from his brother's group, and she was using something to remove the hair on her legs. Now Sesshoumaru was a lord, and as such, got everything he wanted. At this moment he wanted to try out this human's machine.

Snatching it from her he swiftly…. Shaved his leg.

"GIVE ME BACK MY RAZOR!"

And he swiftly… cut his leg.


	20. Gossamer

They, including Sesshoumaru's group, had decided to spend the day by the ocean. Kagome had handed everyone a bathing suit and they, excluding Sesshoumaru, had put them on.

Shippo was teaching Rin how to swim.

When all of a sudden, Rin went to far out and began to struggle. In the blink of an eye Sesshoumaru stood before the Miko with Rin back on dry land. His white clothes had became VERY see threw. Kagome kept trying to look away but couldn't.

"I never knew your clothes were so Gossamer." She stated with a blush.

"What about a goose?" He asked perplexed.


End file.
